My housemate Harriet asked me for a quick chat about the word 'gay' and its negative connotations in case it would spark any interesting ideas that she could think about to help write her essay. Instead I dashed off this quick (not really, took far too long) and unedited (yeah, couldn't be bothered to spruce it up for you guys) thing. Although half-regurgitated from a quick google it's nice to get something like this out, written, and on the internet.
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Discussing terminology as concretely offensive or not can be
difficult because of the multitude of readings you can make. The word ‘gay’,
though, was first adopted by the homosexual community as a positive
description, with the immediate response of the general population beginning to
use a historically positive word as a pejorative. Whilst I obviously don’t believe
that everybody that uses the term has a hurtful implication in mind but
considering the origins of its popular usage I find homophobic connotations
pretty much inescapable. The same has happened, to a lesser extent, with
special needs and the term ‘special’ as a means of questioning someone’s
intellectual capacity. Another example on the same tangent is the charity Scope
– which used to be called The Spastic Society but had to rebrand after ‘spastic’
became an abusive term. More recently
there’s been an inverted version, where a negative word has been subject to an
attempt at using it positively: the word ‘nigger’ has been re-emerging in the
public consciousness, with teens describing their friends as their nigz, niggahs,
etc. It’s not reclaiming the word – it’s an insult to bring something with massive
overtones of centuries of oppression into such a mundane context. When
something is so loaded, it can’t be anything but an insult when rich white
girls who listen to Odd Future decide that it’s a funny idea to use it. There’s
a clear lack of respect and obvious attempt at getting a rise from someone. It’s
the snatching, as opposed to forming, of an identity and the use of both ‘gay’
as an insult or ‘nigger’ as a banality by privileged (or the majority of the) people
who are ignorant to context or just plain sadistic does little but to demean
those it means something to. I find it hard to understand why people persist
with terms if they can emote (however hard that can be) even more a moment with
a homosexual teenager growing up as a ‘gay’ person alongside the connotation
that this is synonymous with being second class or pathetic.
A way in which people commonly get confused with why ‘gay’
is offensive is to assume that the issue is one of political correctness. I’m
not going to attempt to tackle that entire issue here (Stewart Lee dissects it brilliantly here and here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IYx4Bc6_eE
/ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43uZwar92UY
) but the implication that it is really gets my goat. If we allow it to be an
issue exclusively based on ‘pc’ or not ‘pc’ terminology we ignore the pretty
important issue that is genuinely homophobic bullying in schools that’s
practically ignored because of teachers dismissing it as banter or presuming that
‘gay’ is being used in a ‘harmless’ way. Race is, rightly, dealt with in an
incredibly serious way. Homophobic bullying should be, too.
One reason I think the word ‘gay’ (I have got to stop
bothering with these inverted commas, right?) is so commonly used in a negative
way is that people have the illusion of it as, at worst, a mild insult. “It couldn’t
hurt anyone”, “(s)he knows the score” and so on. Yes, it can be to some, but sexual
orientation is invisible. Homosexuality is not something that someone can see
(as opposed to, say, your race). This means it can’t be challenged – there is
no way of conclusively demonstrating that you are heterosexual. The lack of any
effective recourse is what makes homophobic insults so effective as a bullying
tactic.
At school, in our
formative years, the currency of kids' conversation is often mean - and that's
part of the rough and tumble of their lives. Children relish in the use of
unacceptable terminology and yet homophobic insults’ potency lies in the
fact that they strike in a necessarily personal place, one that may or may not
have been come to terms with. Donald Christie: "If there's an area of life
that children themselves feel insecure about they're aware of their own
vulnerability. The whole point of bullying is about identifying and
accentuating weakness in others." What can be poked gently just to get a reaction
can accidentally touch a tender area and, once that line is breached, can spill
into genuine harassment. People like to bully.
Helen Cowie: "It's a form of peer group control, boys
have to be masculine and macho and anyone who isn't must go along with it or
face being bullied. It's a form of bullying that domineering people seek out
vulnerable people and school age is a time of emergent sexuality which is
itself a vulnerable time."
For me, one of my most annoying aspects about the culture is
when it becomes ‘gay’ to point out that ‘gay’ isn’t bad. The idea that the word
no longer refers to sexuality is a ridiculous attempt at justifying anti-gay
sentiment. The standard response to even mild trepidation or vocalised concerns
about someone saying “that’s so gay” is that you’ll be laughed at. And then
told how gay you are. I would not expect an honest, apologetic response: any
concerns seem to do little but to further identify you as a target. If a person
is genuinely offended and considering raising concern then they put themselves
at risk at increasingly vitriolic insults.
That’s my argument for why it’s offensive, anyway. But whilst,
as a straight guy without a large number of gay friends, I might not be able to
claim any real right to be offended, the reason why it really irks me is that I
am embarrassed by it. It is so outdated and the fact that so many of my friends
use it sullies how I think of them. The idea that people my age would still use
it as an acceptable insult or pejorative just seems ridiculous, almost mind-boggling.
I know that, for much of this little thing, I’ve spoken about ‘gay’ as an
insult more than a casually negative term but I find it hard to separate them.
The recurring negative uses of the word are symptomatic of a mind stuck in a
childish schoolyard throwback, a state that I strive to remove myself from. And
although many have been raised on it, negative uses of ‘gay’ sincerely make me
question those that I like. Dismiss my attitude as baseless liberal guilt if
you will, but don’t presume lack of offence in your generalised insults.
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All of my quotes, some of the stuff I’ve rephrased but
naughtily not credited, and half of my research comes from this article.
Seriously, don’t hate me, so much is lifted from it, I know it’s shameful: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/7289390.stm/ // I
also used this: http://stupidevilbastard.com/2009/08/campaign_to_stop_use_of_gay_as_perjoritive_probably_wont_work/
Further, completely unrelated reading but worthy of a month’s
blogging (paywall, but...): http://www.thesundaytimes.co.uk/sto/Magazine/Features/article1199062.ece?shareToken=e7c567a0d6b2462df3a7380a6be24204
And something nice that’s been going around Twitter: http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/4E982E/9wows.com/spectacular-images-of-the-insides-of-musical-instruments/
